Thursday 30 June 2011

Reason no. 253 not to get married....In Laws

I've come across this article twice today. If it is actually not a fake then I think it's brilliant that the whole thing has gone public. It is apparently a genuine email a woman has sent to her future daughter in-law. Clearly an upper/middle class twit who assumes they are above everyone else. Also I'm sure I read she is 60' so I'm going to class her as an old person and therefore she is  obviously a Vicktor Mildrew. Such a shame. 


The nob in question has criticised the poor girl for all sorts of mundane twaddle. However she's clearly not the brightest of old farts as she has done this by email. All it took was for the poor girl to forward it to a few close friends, which has lead to it being plastered all over the internet. Justice? I think so. 


Word of the Day: Unorthodox


Quote of the Day: 'Your regrets aren't what you did, but what you didn't do. So I take every opportunity' Cameron Diaz

Mr Lover Lover

A man has claimed to have had sex with over 1000 women. That's a pretty steep number and for those of you who take pride in 'magic numbers' I bet it put yours to shame! Oh wait, did I say women? I meant cars!
That's right people, the Lothario boasts to have made love to over 1000 cars and has even had a 5 year relationship with Victoria, VW Beetle. He is currently in a relationship with Vanilla, another VW Beetle. I guess they must be his 'type'! However it appears they have an 'open' relationship as he also spends intimate time with Cinnamon, a Opal GT and Ginger, a Ford Ranger Splash. 

Is he trying to emulate the hedonistic lifestyles of good old Hugh and Charlie. I've said it before and I'll say it again, this world is making people crazy. At least I admit it sends me doolalee!! 

I should also mention the the car lover's most 'intense' sexual experience was with the helicopter from Air Wolf. Erm, get in there son.....?!

Special Needs and Education

I've not blogged for a while, I read this article today, the Prime Ministers attempt to improve the way individuals with special needs receive and education. Read it. 


I think before anyone takes sides there are a few things you should place into consideration. Do you or someone within your family have a disability? I think the answer to that should affect how strongly you feel about this subject. Nobody within my family (that I am aware of) has a disability, I however have had the opportunity to work with young people who have disabilities. My personal opinion is that it all comes down to the individual. I think that what will serve them best both within that moment and the long run should be what is the deciding factor in what type of education they receive. However I feel like I have not got enough experience within this area to have a fully educated answer. Hopefully whatever happens will improve the opportunities for young people with disabilities with regards to their education. I guess it will be interesting to see how this one pans out. 

Sunday 19 June 2011

What would your animal be?

Have you ever read His Dark Materials by Philip Pullman? If you haven't I highly recommend them! Although if you are not much of a reader (Why are you here?) then you can always settle for the film 'The Golden Compass'. It's mediocre in comparison to the books however. 
Why am I babbling about Philip Pullman's work? His book features the concept of people having 'daemons' which is a manifestation of their soul and are represented as animals. As children people's animals continually change forms, being a tabby cat one moment to a ostrich the next. This is all dependent on their mood. As people mature so do their daemons, and they eventually settle on a specific form. Which led to the discussion of what would our own daemons be and what daemons would our friends have. My friend was convinced theirs would be the same as my pet dog Charlie. I agreed, mostly due to their scents being incredibly similar. My daemon would probably be a Chimp. The following video is how I imagine my daemon would behave.

It was also concluded that chickens would represent female chavs. Why? There are far too many chavs out there constantly dropping kids. There are far too many chickens constantly laying eggs. See the connection?! Male chavs would have rats as their daemons.


Word of the Day: Transition


Quote of the Day: 'Without continual growth and progress, such words as improvement, progress and success have no meaning.' Benjamin Franklin 

Tuesday 14 June 2011

Toss the salad

Whilst preparing for the BBQ I pulled out the salad bowl and utensils used to 'toss the salad'. This got me thinking, I'm sure there is another meaning to this phrase, but what the hell is it?


 Half out of curiosity and half out of an attempt to embarrass my mother I decided to ask her if she knew what it meant. She revealed she had her suspicions but suggested I used urban dictionary to find out for myself. I was more impressed that she knew what urban dictionary was than she apparently knew what 'toss the salad' meant. Five minutes later my mother informed me that she herself had looked it up on urban dictionary and it was not what she had expected. She refused to tell me what it was but hinted that it would be something I'd be aware of. Two hours later I've finally gotten the chance to investigate this phrase. I feel the embarrassment lies in my court, I wish I'd never asked my mother now! Furthermore when my father eventually reads this I'm sure he too will ask my mother what it means, as my mother and I asked him about tossing the salad and he assumed we wanted him to prepare the food. Dad don't ask, stay in your innocent bubble where it's safe!


Word of the Day: Miscalculation 


Quote of the Day: 'They used to bow down to gods, things change' Buffy


Guilty Confession of the Day: I've resorted to watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer repeats whilst I have nothing better to do with my time. I feel as though I am 13 again and it is the school holidays. I'd never have thought I'd still be doing the same thing 10 years later. Also I know I said I'd never express my religious views, but the above quote was too good to overlook. Hello my name is Kyle and I am a geek. I have been lacking the cool factor for 23 years now. 

Monday 13 June 2011

Blogs

I'm not sure if anyone actually does this when reading my blog (if anybody does) but you can click on 'next blog' at the top of this page and it brings you to another random blog. I occasionally do this, initially to see what other people blog about. The two main things I continually come across are artists showing their latest pieces of work and family blogs where 'The Robinsons' tell us what they go up to this weekend. I do like to have a bit of a gander at some of the art but don't really read much of the family stuff. The family ones are mostly American, I guess it must be a big thing over there. I also come across a lot of foreign blogs, I occasionally translate them but they are generally art, photography, music or film based.


As time progressed I started doing this in hope I would find something that was similar to my own blog. I can't say that I have, but I have come across the odd funny blog that I chose to 'follow'. I also have to admit I've started following a woman who puts up here latest take on recipes. Mainly because her last blog was about Enchilda Lasagne. You are right up my street pet! Well I'll have to exclude the sweetcorn from the recipe as those of you who know me must be aware that I'm allergic!! The three Deadly S's (Sweetcorn, Suncream and Salmon). 


I came across one by a girl who lives in London, her last post was in January and she was having a rant about London Bus Drivers. I found it quiet amusing but two things stopped me from following. Firstly it appears she has given up on her blog. More importantly she sounded like a complete chav and her grammar and writing was atrocious. Not that mine is great or that I am a snob but I could only cope with reading so much of-: 'So I got on da bus n asked if he cud let me on for free. The prik lookd at me lyk I waz a piece of shit n sed no. I waz so mad n I ad 2 get to the doctors coz it waz important'. Sure thing love, those crabs won't get rid of themselves. (What I found really aggravating about it was the fact that blogger has it's own spell check. Whilst it is American, it's still better than having to read chav talk!)


Part of my searching for other blogs similar to mine is due to my complex I have about being weird. The whole blog is themed on my quest for normality so I guess it is understandable. Although it does make me somewhat happy that so far none of the other blogs offer personal twists on weird news and provide philosophical ramblings on many aspects of life. So I should be proud to be an individual I guess. I was hoping that eventually I would write a blog called 'The End' in which I had finally succeeded in  becoming a normal person. I therefore would no longer need to post random babblings on the internet. Alas I feel that I will never be normal and furthermore have grown rather attached to this blog so don't particularly want to!


Word of the Day: Kindred


Quote of the Day: 'I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not.' Kurt Cobain



Lefties

A Psychologist is claiming lefties are less likely to be gifted. The article is in the mirror, which I don't really like to read but at least it isn't the Daily Mail! It also points out that both Barack Obama and David Cameron are left handed. Read it, not for the utter rubbish the Psychologist claims but for the last two lines, they garnered a smile from me! 


As a left handed person I'm obviously insulted! I'll list a few other left handed people who are arguably gifted. Shut up stupid Psychologist. (What makes it worse is he is left handed too. What a nob)

PRESIDENTS
Herbert Hoover  (1874-1964) 31st 
Ronald Reagan  (1911 -    ) 40th
George H.W. Bush  (1924-    ) 41st
Bill Clinton  (1946-    ) 
42ndBarack Obama  (1961-    ) 44th     

Miscellaneous Left-Handers
Alexander the Great
Charlemagne, Holy Roman emperor 
Julius Caesar, Roman general
Josephine de Beauharnais
King Louis XVI of France
Queen Victoria of England
King George II of England
King George VI of England
Prince Charles of England
Prince William of England
Fidel Castro, Cuban leader
Henry Ford, automobile manufacturer
David Rockefeller, banker
Helen Keller, advocate for the blind 
Edwin Buzz Aldrin, astronaut
Wally Schirra, astronaut
Dr. Mark Silver, surgeon
Jay Leno, host
 Uri Geller, psychokinetic performer
 Matt Groening, cartoonist
 Bart Simpson, cartoon character

Left-Handed Authors
Lewis Carroll 
H.G. Wells

Left-Handed Musicians
David Byrne (Talking Heads) Kurt Cobain (Nirvana)
Phil Collins (Genesis) 
Glenn Frey (the Eagles)
Eric Gale, guitarist
Noel Gallagher (Oasis)
Crysal Gayle
Kevin Griffin, guitarist & lead singer (Better than Ezra)
Thomas Hedley, vocalist/musician 
Jimi Hendrix
Isaac Hayes
Judy Garland
Tony Iommi, guitarist (Black Sabbath)
Paul McCartney (the Beatles; Wings)
George Michael (Wham!)
Robert Plant (Led Zepplin)
John Lydon a.k.a. Johnny Rotten (Sex Pistols / Public Image Ltd.) 
Seal 
Paul Simon (Simon & Garfunkel)
Left-Handed Artists
 Michelangelo 
Raphael
Leonardo da Vinci (RH paralyzed?) 

Left-Handed Actors
Matthew Broderick
Charlie Chaplin 
Tom Cruise
Quinn Cummings
Matt Dillon
Robert DeNiro
Richard Dreyfuss
Peter Fonda
Whoopie Goldberg
Goldie Hawn
Jim Henson, puppetteer
Kermit the Frog
Angelina Jolie
Diane Keaton Nicole Kidman
Lisa Kudrow 
Michael Landon
Cleavon Little
Shirley MacLaine
Steve McQueen
Marilyn Monroe
Robert Morse
Ryan O'Neal
Sarah Jessica Parker
Anthony Perkins
Luke Perry
Robert Redford
Keanu Reeves
Julia Roberts
Mickey Rourke
Jerry Seinfeld, comedian
Christian Slater
Emma Thompson Dick Van Dyke
Bruce Willis
Oprah Winfrey

*For a full list of famous lefties click HERE.

Pigs on the run!

This article made my day. 8 pigs toppled over the trailer that they were in that was transporting them to the slaughter house and escaped!! Sadly only two are still on the run. Fingers crossed that Pinky and Perky live a long and prosperous life in the wild!!!

Human Cows...

I found this article today. Scientists in Argentina have genetically engineered a cow to produce milk that will closely resemble human milk by adding two human genes to her genetic make up. They named her Rosita. So the big debate with genetic engineering is sure to be brought up yet again. I personally think it's a good thing what they have done. I'm about to throw out some feminist psychological waffle, but here goes. There is immense pressure both by the NHS and society as a whole for new mothers to breast feed. My friends have recalled personal experiences were nurses and midwives have been less than understanding when they struggle to get their newborn baby to breast feed. Obviously if people are finding it easy then they are best off doing this. But whatever the mother eats and drinks will have an impact upon their child. So that Lamb Rogan Josh from the night before is probably going to give the new nipper one hell of a tummy ache! Also for the mothers who struggle to get their baby to breast feed face the potential stress of feeling inadequate as a mother which can ultimately lead to issues such as the baby blues and even PND. There is also so argument that breast feeding improves the bond between mother and child. To be honest, I wasn't breast fed and I have a perfectly sound relationship with my mother now. Although maybe that is why I am less than normal?


So here is an easier option for those who wish to have that curry on a Friday night! The big question is what next? I'm a bit of a geek and watched all sorts of Sci-Fi programmes when I was younger so my imagination is running wild! Half human half Lion people? Liomans!! Making 'Superhumans' by giving them all the good qualities of other species such as vision, agility, speed, strength, reflexes etc? Well I'm sure a lot of people will be against that but I personally think that sounds AMAZING! 

Friday 10 June 2011

Tattoos

Tattoos are something that always intrigue me. When people get it right they look really cool in my eyes but when they get it wrong... Here's someone who probably will regret this in a few years time. The nob in question has had the profile picture of each of her Facebook friends tattooed all over her arm. She had 152 friends. Well not that it's a popularity conquest but I currently have 600 friends. I think I'd have to give up more than one arm to copy her. Like a dog, a tattoo is for life...not just Christmas. When people do stuff like this I think they should just have Dick Head tattooed across their forehead. But that's just my opinion, perhaps when she's 60 she won't regret it.


Plus I know for a fact that whilst I have met all of my 600 friends I don't know them all that well and probably won't see some of them ever again! (although I'm due another friend cull, I was upto nearly 750 and got down to 550 earlier this year...I'm everybodies mate when I'm pissed I swear!) So she must have people on her arm who are just 'randoms'. What a nob!!


Word of the Day: Proficiency 


Quote of the Day: 'The Imagination imitates. It is the critical spirit that creates.' Oscar Wilde 

The perfect gift?

In just over 2 months time my sister is due to have a baby. My parent's first grandchild and my first niece! I'm very excited. One predicament I have is what to buy. Obviously I'll open my wallet and purchase clothes and other various things. My big issue with this is none of them are sentimental. I want a gift that means something and in theory will last forever. One idea was to buy a bottle of whiskey that she could have when she is 18. I decided that this was a bad idea. The two reasons for this are a) maybe she won't be a drinker b) me and her mother will probably guzzle it down before she turns 18.
Today I had a genius idea. Well I think it is. I got paid today (drinks are not on me this weekend) so was looking at children's books on Amazon. Mostly to buy for my niece but I have a habit of collecting children's books. Well books in general but I still enjoy Roald Dahl every once in a while. That is when it hit me. I can make her a children's book! I'm bored, I enjoy writing and it means I can create a gift that in theory will be sentimental. I've got a 2 month deadline so it'll be reminiscent of being at uni! I've hit a bit of a drought with work at the moment so I actually miss writing essays.
I don't want to divulge too much information as I want the details to be a surprise. Plus it could be a masterpiece that will change the future of children's books and I don't want someone to steal my ideas! Probably not. I realise that as I am writing for a child I have to omit referecnes to poo and farts. Which ruined my original idea of having the flying whale shit on the dragon to put out his flames. I've had to settle on him spouting water on the flames instead. It will also feature a magical cat who will in no way be anything like my cat who is a bitch that kills innocent birds and meows repeatedly. I don't understand what you want you stupid cat! The new and improved cat doesn't kill birds, can speak English and can also fly.
The biggest set back to this story is the drawings. Yes as it is a children's book it needs pictures. I'm an adequate drawer but it needs to be perfect. I have many artistic friends who I could ask but I want this to be all my own work. One of my problems with drawing is patience, I want it done quickly. For once I will attempt to be patient and hopefully be able to produce something that is in league with the works of Picasso.This 2 month deadline is going to be interesting! 

Wednesday 8 June 2011

Hypnotised....for life

A hypnotist managed to leave three people in a trance after knocking himself out. This has got my brain ticking....what if they had been hypnotised forever!! What if you are actually under a trance and everything you do is being subtly controlled by someone you know? All sounds very Tin Foil Hat but what if it was possible? Perhaps it offers a better explanation for why George Bush was such a douche? Or maybe he had the american population hypnotised and that is how he got into power? Surely people aren't that stupid that they voted for him TWICE out of their own free will??


Maybe I am not normal because someone has hypnotised me and they are making me act this way? Maybe that is why I talk to the fridge! Yes yes I like this! I am weird because somebody else is making me do these things! The government? A friend? An angry ex lover? My dog? 

Stupid Supermarkets

A dopey Supermarket in Scotland had a price glitch resulting in 3 crates of beer selling for £11 instead of £20. It resulted in police being called as a large amount of people flocked to the Supermarket to take advantage of this mistake! If only it happened in Rochdale! Actually with our residents and the crime rates the way they are I imagine things would be rather wild here if the majority of our towns people were tanked up on beer! But still, gutted!!

The Immortal Dog

I stumbled across this article today. A dog was shot 40 times in the head and buried but still managed to survive. Whilst this appalling degree of animal cruelty has left me feeling disgusted I love the happy ending! Whilst I am aware that I am not normal, I can not comprehend how someone can carry out such cruel and evil acts upon an animal. I hope the dog in question manages to hunt her attackers down and rips out their throats. Yes, I feel strongly about animal cruelty. The dog has garnered a Facebook following, with a group dedicated to her will to live. I joined it, I'm so cool. 

Tuesday 7 June 2011

Do what's Expected!!!

Recently Marriage has had a rather profound impact upon my future. Not that I am getting married but a few people I know are. So I've been looking into some of the more 'out there' marriages. 
Irregardless of sexuality, there is phenomenal pressure from the government, media, education systems and our own families to find a partner who is 'the one'. I'd like to point out I'm not a cynic, I just don't feel the need to pursue this.  I feel this pressure has made some people go a little mad. A man in Korea married a pillow in 2010 and a woman has married the Eiffel Tower. I'm always completely overjoyed when friends of mine become engaged or get married (to another human being, but hey if they wanted to marry a pillow I'd understand....men in white coats...) Personally, for myself, it just seems to be surrounded by so many external factors that pressurise us to do it.  I hope I've not offended anyone, it's a personal view for me and my life...each to their own, if you are happy I am happy for you :)!  I just feel it's sent some people a bit mental. The pillow and Eiffel Tower people are somewhat tame to some of the ones I came across!
Celebrities such as Cameron Diaz and Enrique Iglesias have never tied the knot and both are in their mid to late thirties. Is this because they have not yet found 'the one'? I doubt it. Marriage isn't for everyone. This societal pressure and expectation that it is what everyone should do is archaic. 
Which brings me to another point. I told a friend today that I planned to use some of my savings to go travelling with. Their response was 'Shouldn't you spend it on something like a deposit for your first house? That is what most people do.' What is wrong with me?! I want to be normal but I just have this thirst to explore and not be tied down. I want to see the world. Experience things that Rochdale will never offer. Do I sound young and immature? For once I don't think so. I'm 23, plenty of time to continue growing as a person. Just because it is what people normally do and expect you to do does not mean I'm going to, especially if I don't want to. Is this a rant? Slightly. Rochdale is making me feel more and more trapped by the day! Buy a house? I need to see a few more countries before I can make that sort of commitment! As for marriage....I'll propose to the Dog if my parents start to nag.


Word of the Day: Individuality


Quote of the Day:'In olden times sacrifices were made at the altar - a practise which is still continued.' Helen Rowland


Random Thought of the Day: At what age are you supposed to stop shivering when you stop peeing? Did everybody experience the shiver when they were young? How about now? 


Guilty Confession of the Day: I still shiver when I stop peeing. 


*I just want to reiterate - I'm 23! I want to explore some more. I'm not fully against any of the above. I feel comfortable enough in putting these views on here in the hope that I won't cause offense or come across as 'wrong'. Tis why i don't ever blog about religion. Everyone but Atheists hate Atheists! 

Monday 6 June 2011

Kidney for Ipad

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>WARNING<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<                                      (Contains Image that may disturb)



















I just came across this beauty of an article. It is on the Daily Mirror website which isn't the best of sources to use but it has shocked, disgusted, amused and basically boggled my mind. So therefore it earns a place here! A 17 year old boy sold one of his kidneys for $3,392 so he could purchase a ipad 2 and a laptop. He has not just contemplated selling a vital organ for financial gain, he has actually gone through with it and what's more purchased something that won't last as long as his bloody kidney would have!


Obviously money has different values in different countries so I hope he sold it for the equivalent of a large amount of money in China. And what he chose to use that money for was his personal choice, for me it seems a little disrespectful to his former organ. Would anybody else sell a kidney? How much for? What would you buy?


I'd sell mine and buy an I-phone. No wait, a Blackberry Torch. Oh I can't decide! Maybe I'd earn enough to be able to afford both? But what about when they are last seasons trend? I suppose I need the other kidney so I can't really sell that. I'd probably struggle without a lung. Maybe I could sell my left testicle and buy a Mac!!!


Reminds me a bit of Bruno. He sold his adopted baby for an Ipod or something didn't he? I wouldn't contemplate selling my niece but I guess I could sell my mum for a Robin reliant? 




Word of the Day: Dispensable 


Quote of the Day: 'It seems impossible, until it's done' Nelson Mandela 

Katie Piper Foundation

Last month I posted a blog called Inside/Outside. I forgot to put a link to Katie Piper's Foundation. So here it is!

People who do stupid things...

I stumbled across this article today. 'Man who buried himself alive found dead'. I am aware that death is no laughing matter. But you have to appreciate the irony! 


How many of us have fixations with death? I'm currently reading a book called The Tibetan Book of Living & Dying by Sogyal Rinpoche. I would recommend it to everyone. Whilst the roots of it's teachings lie in Buddhism, they can easily be incorporated into other religious cultures. I think the moral behind what happened to Mr Buried Alive is we should never toy with the idea of death. We should be aware that we are all mortal and it is going to happen. We shouldn't become obsessed with it or dismiss thinking about it altogether. 


I fear my blog has gotten too preachy recently. I promise to talk more about poo in future.

Sunday 5 June 2011

Philosophical Drunks

Last month I discussed the various types of drunk people I have both come across and behaved like myself. It occurred to me last night that I missed a very important one from this list. The Philosophical Drunk! How many of us have gotten into deep conversations about different elements of life? I love the whole concept of philosophy. Questions like 'Is the colour I perceive as blue the same as your blue?' or 'Does bacon taste the same for me as it does for you?' fascinate me. 


Perhaps it is more due to my personality and the people I associate with as to why I find myself entering philosophical conversations whilst I am drunk. Last night the topic was culture and racism. Thankfully it occurred to both myself and my friend that the conversation was taking a serious turn and we abruptly ended. Perhaps this  was a wrong move on our behalf as we both proceeded to cause a surprising amount of mischief with a pork pie. I won't even begin to discuss what happened to the piece of birthday cake...


This has not always been the case. I have one friend who my friends dread me meeting up with on a night out because we can spend hours discussing random philosophical crap. I think I have righted the world more times than I can count or sadly remember whilst under the influence of alcohol. Herein lies the problem. Whilst alcohol has led to myself and probably many others having deep philosophical conversations we probably forget half of what was said the next morning! So alcohol is both facilitating and prohibiting our chances of a better life! Although I guess this is not something we didn't already know. In future I am going to record my drunken philosophical conversations because at the time I know I am convinced I have all the answers. I'll probably be in for a shock when I discover how much utter shit I chat!!


Word of the Day: Evolution


Quote of the Day: 'The purpose of life is a life of purpose' Robert Bryne


Guilty confession of the Day: A middle aged woman purchased around twenty 'romantic' novels from the supermarket I work in. I was so close to informing her that she would be better off investing in a 'toy' as this would save her both time and money. I refrained from doing so, not out of politeness but because I still need that job!

Friday 3 June 2011

Facebookbots

Like the majority of people I associate with I have a Facebook account. I check my account regularly, using it to communicate publicly and privately with my friends. I feel there are many good things about Facebook. It allows people to keep in touch with others who they may have lost contact with if Facebook hadn't been available. I've had my account for four or five years now so have amassed a large collection of photos I have been 'tagged' in. It therefore allows me to look back on moments in my life I may otherwise have forgotten.(I have to admit sometimes I wish I could forget them. I went through a stage where I thought streaking was cool. I can now look back at the photographic evidence of how much of a prat I can be).


I could continue with the various things that I think are good about Facebook but this is not the point of this blog.  I feel that some are becoming too dependent upon Facebook. It is as though Facebook has become part of their personality. Before I continue, I am aware that I use this blog as an outlet for my thoughts and opinions. However there is a big BUT. I express elements of my life that I feel can be discussed publicly and what is more I have already talked about with someone before I publish them on here. More importantly, these are not what I deem private. They are not a way of expressing emotions or opinions that I feel I can not do vocally or socially. This is where I think the problem has arisen. 


I can guarantee when I log onto Facebook I will come across someone openly or subliminally expressing an emotion or issue that they have not discussed and what is more it should probably be kept private. I do not actually have a problem with people doing this. My issue is that whilst technology has made it easier for them to express themselves it has also in turn made it more and more difficult for people to express themselves in the real world. 
I find it amusing that there are films available which feature Robots trying to take over the world. But are all these people who choose to live through technology and struggle to tackle issues in the real worlds actually becoming robots? I have stumbled across so much crap on Facebook over the years that I have contemplated deleting my account. People openly telling the world incredibly private details about their or someone else's life. I feel I am quiet an open person but some things should be kept private and what's more not discussed online but in person. I have witnessed people expressing issues with friends or former friends both openly or making subtle digs. Why do this? It is because Facebook has disabled your ability to communicate as a human being in social situations! 

Another explanation is societies growing obsession with fame. People want everybody to know their intimate details because then people will talk about them! Whilst people were once famous for actually having talent or having done great things we now live in a society where the likes of Paris Hilton are more well known amongst the younger generations than the Prime Minister! (Sorry to use two blatant nobs for my examples but you get my point I hope). I think this is why I loved Scre4m so much, it made a relevant dig at the mentality of a large group of my generation! 

But why have I not deleted my account? Because Facebook has a grasp over me too! So the robots are taking over!!!

Word of the Day: Communication

Quote of the Day: 'Is it Facebook official?' Various

Random Thought of the Day: How do they make some grapes 'seedless'? Surely they would be infertile? (I'll google this!)

*I've added this note because whilst my last status was 'has just had a massive shit at work' I've had Facebook for a long time so I may have guilty of committing the above faux pas in the past!!

Family Toilet Habits

This blog is due to an incident this morning. Whilst I was having a shower before I went to work my mother shouted and informed me she needed the toilet immediately. I asked if she could wait two minutes but she expressed that this was a life or death poo situation. So with a head full of shampoo I proceeded to unlock the door and got back into the shower. My mother entered the bathroom and did her business whilst I was in the shower. I suppose I should inform you that our shower does now have a curtain. We both laughed at the situation but this is somewhat the norm in my house. 
About a year ago I revealed to a group of friends that I am happy to use the toilet whilst my mum is in the bath. Both me and my sister are happy to use the toilet in each others company also. Some of my friends felt it wasn't too weird but not many felt comfortable to do this themselves. One however was shocked and appalled. So shocked in fact that they created a Facebook group about this. My father does not conform to our family toilet bonding sessions, preferring to do his business in private. So within our household my father is perceived as 'weird'. Within the rest of society he is probably viewed as normal, and the rest of us are the strange ones. 


As my quest for normality continues I am noticing more aspects of my life and behaviour are prohibiting me from achieving the status of being a 'normal' person. Again I can point to genetics. My mum is weird too.

Thursday 2 June 2011

Freedom of Speech

I came across this article today. Police officers in Barnsley have the power to fine people if they swear in public places. Personally I try to ensure my language is respectable enough when I'm in places or situations where making comments such as f*** off may cause offence. Obviously not everyone adopts this moral conduct. I asked a man for I.D at the supermarket last week and his response was 'You're having a laugh right, you f****** c***?' This was not said aggressively, it was simple everyday language for the apparently 26 year old gentleman. 


I have two queries about the new procedure being conducted in Barnsley. Firstly what counts as a swear word? I think we can all agree that the F word and C word are naughty words that we should never use in front of mummy and daddy. However I've been brought up to believe that piss is another naughty word. A few of my friends have not. I am comfortable with say bitch in front of my parents, but it's still a naughty word for some. I could go and on about what words I've been raised to believe are naughty. The point is everyone has different views on the matter. Is society becoming desensitized to language that was once perceived as profanities? Probably.


 It seems the Barnsley council are trying to go back to the good old days where no one would dare say such naughty words in public. In society where freedom of speech is the norm it seems like Barnsely is a little out of touch. Personally I think that some words are naughty but they are losing the impact they once had as they have become part of everyday language. Barnsely's heart is obviously in the right place, but if you look at other things such as the 9 pm watershed it is clear things are changing. I'm pretty sure Bitch has been used on good old corrie in recent years before 9 pm and lets not get into how much sex on Tv has changed since the 60s.


My second issue is if we start to implement punishment to people who use naughty words, what next? Will the government start fining people for saying the primeminster is a smug prick? Oh shit I swore so I will be fined...if prick is classed as swearing? As nice as it would be for people to not swear, they do. Freedom of speech my arse. I'm telling you, Big Brother is watching!


Word of the Day: Semantics


Quote of the Day: 'I love you all, but you're all f****** mad' Ozzy Osbourne


Guilty Confession of the Day: I forewarned someone this blog would be dedicated to them. This is not the first time I've attempted to kill someone. The first time resulted in our entire science class being banned from experiments (for legal reasons I must refrain from releasing the details). Both times I have unintentionally committed attempted murder this person in question has been my accomplice. I put it to both you dear reader and the said person that this person is in fact mentally disturbed and I am simply easily led.  

Adverts

My life sometimes has it's peak moments of excitement when I sit down and watch the tele. What's more exciting than Sally finding out Kevin has been having another affair?!! The best moments I find are the adverts however. The following two videos are by far my favourite adverts to grace our screens within the past year. 


So what do you think? Are there any better ones out there? Probably but if you haven't picked up on the sarcasm at the start of this I don't actually watch that much TV! I prefer to live my life than watch others pretending to live theirs!