Talking Animals

I stumbled across an article last week about the Nazis attempt to train dogs to talk. I'm not going to discuss the Nazis and get all political. I'm not going to go on about how they are all massive nobs. Nor am I going to babble on about how ridiculous the notion of teaching animals to talk seems to me. What I am going to babble on about is....what if it had worked?!!!

Imagine if your pets could talk back to you? It can't just be me who talks to my dog and cat?! How amazing would it be if your pet's could tell you what was on their mind and explain why they do strange things? I'd ask my cat why she insists on scratching everything. Is she stressed? Or is she intentionally doing it to piss my mum off? My cat does meow an awful lot so I'm guessing if she could turn those meows into words she'd be a chatter box. And why is she hungry ALL the time? Or is she just an attention seeking pain in the butt?
And my dog! I'd have so many questions! Why does he bark at other dogs through our window? Is he trying to say hello or is he telling them to stay away? I know he's all talk and no action. He'll happily bark at Mr Rotweiler through the safety of our living room but but him face to face with one on a field and his little legs turn to jelly!

I'd also have understood what the crow in town was squarking about. Obviously I didn't and gave it a funny look so it proceeded to attack my head (it does look like a bit of a bird nest in fairness). If I'd have known why he was so angry maybe I could have helped?

What about other animals? Are monkey's really cheeky? Maybe they're really boring and like to talk about politics? Are foxes really sly? Perhaps their personality is akin to Mother Teresa and we've got them all wrong? I don't think we've got wasps wrong. They're nobs. 

I realise that this blog is coming across half doctor Doolittle and half crazy. I've not lost the plot I swear, I'm just a little imaginative! 


Word of the Day: Personification


Quote of the Day: 'The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated.' Mahatma Gandhi 


Guilty Confession of the Day: I chose an extra ten minutes in bed over having a shower before work this morning!