I've come across this article twice today. If it is actually not a fake then I think it's brilliant that the whole thing has gone public. It is apparently a genuine email a woman has sent to her future daughter in-law. Clearly an upper/middle class twit who assumes they are above everyone else. Also I'm sure I read she is 60' so I'm going to class her as an old person and therefore she is obviously a Vicktor Mildrew. Such a shame.
The nob in question has criticised the poor girl for all sorts of mundane twaddle. However she's clearly not the brightest of old farts as she has done this by email. All it took was for the poor girl to forward it to a few close friends, which has lead to it being plastered all over the internet. Justice? I think so.
Word of the Day: Unorthodox
Quote of the Day: 'Your regrets aren't what you did, but what you didn't do. So I take every opportunity' Cameron Diaz
Thursday, 30 June 2011
Mr Lover Lover
A man has claimed to have had sex with over 1000 women. That's a pretty steep number and for those of you who take pride in 'magic numbers' I bet it put yours to shame! Oh wait, did I say women? I meant cars!
That's right people, the Lothario boasts to have made love to over 1000 cars and has even had a 5 year relationship with Victoria, VW Beetle. He is currently in a relationship with Vanilla, another VW Beetle. I guess they must be his 'type'! However it appears they have an 'open' relationship as he also spends intimate time with Cinnamon, a Opal GT and Ginger, a Ford Ranger Splash.
Is he trying to emulate the hedonistic lifestyles of good old Hugh and Charlie. I've said it before and I'll say it again, this world is making people crazy. At least I admit it sends me doolalee!!
I should also mention the the car lover's most 'intense' sexual experience was with the helicopter from Air Wolf. Erm, get in there son.....?!
That's right people, the Lothario boasts to have made love to over 1000 cars and has even had a 5 year relationship with Victoria, VW Beetle. He is currently in a relationship with Vanilla, another VW Beetle. I guess they must be his 'type'! However it appears they have an 'open' relationship as he also spends intimate time with Cinnamon, a Opal GT and Ginger, a Ford Ranger Splash.
Is he trying to emulate the hedonistic lifestyles of good old Hugh and Charlie. I've said it before and I'll say it again, this world is making people crazy. At least I admit it sends me doolalee!!
I should also mention the the car lover's most 'intense' sexual experience was with the helicopter from Air Wolf. Erm, get in there son.....?!
Special Needs and Education
I've not blogged for a while, I read this article today, the Prime Ministers attempt to improve the way individuals with special needs receive and education. Read it.
I think before anyone takes sides there are a few things you should place into consideration. Do you or someone within your family have a disability? I think the answer to that should affect how strongly you feel about this subject. Nobody within my family (that I am aware of) has a disability, I however have had the opportunity to work with young people who have disabilities. My personal opinion is that it all comes down to the individual. I think that what will serve them best both within that moment and the long run should be what is the deciding factor in what type of education they receive. However I feel like I have not got enough experience within this area to have a fully educated answer. Hopefully whatever happens will improve the opportunities for young people with disabilities with regards to their education. I guess it will be interesting to see how this one pans out.
I think before anyone takes sides there are a few things you should place into consideration. Do you or someone within your family have a disability? I think the answer to that should affect how strongly you feel about this subject. Nobody within my family (that I am aware of) has a disability, I however have had the opportunity to work with young people who have disabilities. My personal opinion is that it all comes down to the individual. I think that what will serve them best both within that moment and the long run should be what is the deciding factor in what type of education they receive. However I feel like I have not got enough experience within this area to have a fully educated answer. Hopefully whatever happens will improve the opportunities for young people with disabilities with regards to their education. I guess it will be interesting to see how this one pans out.
Sunday, 19 June 2011
What would your animal be?
Have you ever read His Dark Materials by Philip Pullman? If you haven't I highly recommend them! Although if you are not much of a reader (Why are you here?) then you can always settle for the film 'The Golden Compass'. It's mediocre in comparison to the books however.
Why am I babbling about Philip Pullman's work? His book features the concept of people having 'daemons' which is a manifestation of their soul and are represented as animals. As children people's animals continually change forms, being a tabby cat one moment to a ostrich the next. This is all dependent on their mood. As people mature so do their daemons, and they eventually settle on a specific form. Which led to the discussion of what would our own daemons be and what daemons would our friends have. My friend was convinced theirs would be the same as my pet dog Charlie. I agreed, mostly due to their scents being incredibly similar. My daemon would probably be a Chimp. The following video is how I imagine my daemon would behave.
Word of the Day: Transition
Quote of the Day: 'Without continual growth and progress, such words as improvement, progress and success have no meaning.' Benjamin Franklin
It was also concluded that chickens would represent female chavs. Why? There are far too many chavs out there constantly dropping kids. There are far too many chickens constantly laying eggs. See the connection?! Male chavs would have rats as their daemons.
Word of the Day: Transition
Quote of the Day: 'Without continual growth and progress, such words as improvement, progress and success have no meaning.' Benjamin Franklin
Tuesday, 14 June 2011
Toss the salad
Whilst preparing for the BBQ I pulled out the salad bowl and utensils used to 'toss the salad'. This got me thinking, I'm sure there is another meaning to this phrase, but what the hell is it?
Half out of curiosity and half out of an attempt to embarrass my mother I decided to ask her if she knew what it meant. She revealed she had her suspicions but suggested I used urban dictionary to find out for myself. I was more impressed that she knew what urban dictionary was than she apparently knew what 'toss the salad' meant. Five minutes later my mother informed me that she herself had looked it up on urban dictionary and it was not what she had expected. She refused to tell me what it was but hinted that it would be something I'd be aware of. Two hours later I've finally gotten the chance to investigate this phrase. I feel the embarrassment lies in my court, I wish I'd never asked my mother now! Furthermore when my father eventually reads this I'm sure he too will ask my mother what it means, as my mother and I asked him about tossing the salad and he assumed we wanted him to prepare the food. Dad don't ask, stay in your innocent bubble where it's safe!
Word of the Day: Miscalculation
Quote of the Day: 'They used to bow down to gods, things change' Buffy
Guilty Confession of the Day: I've resorted to watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer repeats whilst I have nothing better to do with my time. I feel as though I am 13 again and it is the school holidays. I'd never have thought I'd still be doing the same thing 10 years later. Also I know I said I'd never express my religious views, but the above quote was too good to overlook. Hello my name is Kyle and I am a geek. I have been lacking the cool factor for 23 years now.
Half out of curiosity and half out of an attempt to embarrass my mother I decided to ask her if she knew what it meant. She revealed she had her suspicions but suggested I used urban dictionary to find out for myself. I was more impressed that she knew what urban dictionary was than she apparently knew what 'toss the salad' meant. Five minutes later my mother informed me that she herself had looked it up on urban dictionary and it was not what she had expected. She refused to tell me what it was but hinted that it would be something I'd be aware of. Two hours later I've finally gotten the chance to investigate this phrase. I feel the embarrassment lies in my court, I wish I'd never asked my mother now! Furthermore when my father eventually reads this I'm sure he too will ask my mother what it means, as my mother and I asked him about tossing the salad and he assumed we wanted him to prepare the food. Dad don't ask, stay in your innocent bubble where it's safe!
Word of the Day: Miscalculation
Quote of the Day: 'They used to bow down to gods, things change' Buffy
Guilty Confession of the Day: I've resorted to watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer repeats whilst I have nothing better to do with my time. I feel as though I am 13 again and it is the school holidays. I'd never have thought I'd still be doing the same thing 10 years later. Also I know I said I'd never express my religious views, but the above quote was too good to overlook. Hello my name is Kyle and I am a geek. I have been lacking the cool factor for 23 years now.
Monday, 13 June 2011
Blogs
I'm not sure if anyone actually does this when reading my blog (if anybody does) but you can click on 'next blog' at the top of this page and it brings you to another random blog. I occasionally do this, initially to see what other people blog about. The two main things I continually come across are artists showing their latest pieces of work and family blogs where 'The Robinsons' tell us what they go up to this weekend. I do like to have a bit of a gander at some of the art but don't really read much of the family stuff. The family ones are mostly American, I guess it must be a big thing over there. I also come across a lot of foreign blogs, I occasionally translate them but they are generally art, photography, music or film based.
As time progressed I started doing this in hope I would find something that was similar to my own blog. I can't say that I have, but I have come across the odd funny blog that I chose to 'follow'. I also have to admit I've started following a woman who puts up here latest take on recipes. Mainly because her last blog was about Enchilda Lasagne. You are right up my street pet! Well I'll have to exclude the sweetcorn from the recipe as those of you who know me must be aware that I'm allergic!! The three Deadly S's (Sweetcorn, Suncream and Salmon).
I came across one by a girl who lives in London, her last post was in January and she was having a rant about London Bus Drivers. I found it quiet amusing but two things stopped me from following. Firstly it appears she has given up on her blog. More importantly she sounded like a complete chav and her grammar and writing was atrocious. Not that mine is great or that I am a snob but I could only cope with reading so much of-: 'So I got on da bus n asked if he cud let me on for free. The prik lookd at me lyk I waz a piece of shit n sed no. I waz so mad n I ad 2 get to the doctors coz it waz important'. Sure thing love, those crabs won't get rid of themselves. (What I found really aggravating about it was the fact that blogger has it's own spell check. Whilst it is American, it's still better than having to read chav talk!)
Part of my searching for other blogs similar to mine is due to my complex I have about being weird. The whole blog is themed on my quest for normality so I guess it is understandable. Although it does make me somewhat happy that so far none of the other blogs offer personal twists on weird news and provide philosophical ramblings on many aspects of life. So I should be proud to be an individual I guess. I was hoping that eventually I would write a blog called 'The End' in which I had finally succeeded in becoming a normal person. I therefore would no longer need to post random babblings on the internet. Alas I feel that I will never be normal and furthermore have grown rather attached to this blog so don't particularly want to!
Word of the Day: Kindred
Quote of the Day: 'I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not.' Kurt Cobain
As time progressed I started doing this in hope I would find something that was similar to my own blog. I can't say that I have, but I have come across the odd funny blog that I chose to 'follow'. I also have to admit I've started following a woman who puts up here latest take on recipes. Mainly because her last blog was about Enchilda Lasagne. You are right up my street pet! Well I'll have to exclude the sweetcorn from the recipe as those of you who know me must be aware that I'm allergic!! The three Deadly S's (Sweetcorn, Suncream and Salmon).
I came across one by a girl who lives in London, her last post was in January and she was having a rant about London Bus Drivers. I found it quiet amusing but two things stopped me from following. Firstly it appears she has given up on her blog. More importantly she sounded like a complete chav and her grammar and writing was atrocious. Not that mine is great or that I am a snob but I could only cope with reading so much of-: 'So I got on da bus n asked if he cud let me on for free. The prik lookd at me lyk I waz a piece of shit n sed no. I waz so mad n I ad 2 get to the doctors coz it waz important'. Sure thing love, those crabs won't get rid of themselves. (What I found really aggravating about it was the fact that blogger has it's own spell check. Whilst it is American, it's still better than having to read chav talk!)
Part of my searching for other blogs similar to mine is due to my complex I have about being weird. The whole blog is themed on my quest for normality so I guess it is understandable. Although it does make me somewhat happy that so far none of the other blogs offer personal twists on weird news and provide philosophical ramblings on many aspects of life. So I should be proud to be an individual I guess. I was hoping that eventually I would write a blog called 'The End' in which I had finally succeeded in becoming a normal person. I therefore would no longer need to post random babblings on the internet. Alas I feel that I will never be normal and furthermore have grown rather attached to this blog so don't particularly want to!
Word of the Day: Kindred
Quote of the Day: 'I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not.' Kurt Cobain
Lefties
A Psychologist is claiming lefties are less likely to be gifted. The article is in the mirror, which I don't really like to read but at least it isn't the Daily Mail! It also points out that both Barack Obama and David Cameron are left handed. Read it, not for the utter rubbish the Psychologist claims but for the last two lines, they garnered a smile from me!
As a left handed person I'm obviously insulted! I'll list a few other left handed people who are arguably gifted. Shut up stupid Psychologist. (What makes it worse is he is left handed too. What a nob)
As a left handed person I'm obviously insulted! I'll list a few other left handed people who are arguably gifted. Shut up stupid Psychologist. (What makes it worse is he is left handed too. What a nob)
- PRESIDENTS
- Herbert Hoover (1874-1964) 31st
- Ronald Reagan (1911 - ) 40th
- George H.W. Bush (1924- ) 41st
- Bill Clinton (1946- )
- 42ndBarack Obama (1961- ) 44th
- Alexander the Great
- Charlemagne, Holy Roman emperor
- Julius Caesar, Roman general
- Josephine de Beauharnais
- King Louis XVI of France
- Queen Victoria of England
- King George II of England
- King George VI of England
- Prince Charles of England
- Prince William of England
- Fidel Castro, Cuban leader
- Henry Ford, automobile manufacturer
- David Rockefeller, banker
- Helen Keller, advocate for the blind
- Edwin Buzz Aldrin, astronaut
- Wally Schirra, astronaut
- Dr. Mark Silver, surgeon
- Jay Leno, host
- Uri Geller, psychokinetic performer
- Matt Groening, cartoonist
- Bart Simpson, cartoon character
- Left-Handed Authors
- Lewis Carroll
- H.G. Wells
- Left-Handed Musicians
- David Byrne (Talking Heads) Kurt Cobain (Nirvana)
- Phil Collins (Genesis)
- Glenn Frey (the Eagles)
- Eric Gale, guitarist
- Noel Gallagher (Oasis)
- Crysal Gayle
- Kevin Griffin, guitarist & lead singer (Better than Ezra)
- Thomas Hedley, vocalist/musician
- Jimi Hendrix
- Isaac Hayes
- Judy Garland
- Tony Iommi, guitarist (Black Sabbath)
- Paul McCartney (the Beatles; Wings)
- George Michael (Wham!)
- Robert Plant (Led Zepplin)
- John Lydon a.k.a. Johnny Rotten (Sex Pistols / Public Image Ltd.)
- Seal
- Paul Simon (Simon & Garfunkel)
- Left-Handed Artists
- Michelangelo
- Raphael
- Leonardo da Vinci (RH paralyzed?)
- Left-Handed Actors
- Matthew Broderick
- Charlie Chaplin
- Tom Cruise
- Quinn Cummings
- Matt Dillon
- Robert DeNiro
- Richard Dreyfuss
- Peter Fonda
- Whoopie Goldberg
- Goldie Hawn
- Jim Henson, puppetteer
- Kermit the Frog
- Angelina Jolie
- Diane Keaton Nicole Kidman
- Lisa Kudrow
- Michael Landon
- Cleavon Little
- Shirley MacLaine
- Steve McQueen
- Marilyn Monroe
- Robert Morse
- Ryan O'Neal
- Sarah Jessica Parker
- Anthony Perkins
- Luke Perry
- Robert Redford
- Keanu Reeves
- Julia Roberts
- Mickey Rourke
- Jerry Seinfeld, comedian
- Christian Slater
- Emma Thompson Dick Van Dyke
- Bruce Willis
- Oprah Winfrey
- *For a full list of famous lefties click HERE.
Pigs on the run!
This article made my day. 8 pigs toppled over the trailer that they were in that was transporting them to the slaughter house and escaped!! Sadly only two are still on the run. Fingers crossed that Pinky and Perky live a long and prosperous life in the wild!!!
Human Cows...
I found this article today. Scientists in Argentina have genetically engineered a cow to produce milk that will closely resemble human milk by adding two human genes to her genetic make up. They named her Rosita. So the big debate with genetic engineering is sure to be brought up yet again. I personally think it's a good thing what they have done. I'm about to throw out some feminist psychological waffle, but here goes. There is immense pressure both by the NHS and society as a whole for new mothers to breast feed. My friends have recalled personal experiences were nurses and midwives have been less than understanding when they struggle to get their newborn baby to breast feed. Obviously if people are finding it easy then they are best off doing this. But whatever the mother eats and drinks will have an impact upon their child. So that Lamb Rogan Josh from the night before is probably going to give the new nipper one hell of a tummy ache! Also for the mothers who struggle to get their baby to breast feed face the potential stress of feeling inadequate as a mother which can ultimately lead to issues such as the baby blues and even PND. There is also so argument that breast feeding improves the bond between mother and child. To be honest, I wasn't breast fed and I have a perfectly sound relationship with my mother now. Although maybe that is why I am less than normal?
So here is an easier option for those who wish to have that curry on a Friday night! The big question is what next? I'm a bit of a geek and watched all sorts of Sci-Fi programmes when I was younger so my imagination is running wild! Half human half Lion people? Liomans!! Making 'Superhumans' by giving them all the good qualities of other species such as vision, agility, speed, strength, reflexes etc? Well I'm sure a lot of people will be against that but I personally think that sounds AMAZING!
So here is an easier option for those who wish to have that curry on a Friday night! The big question is what next? I'm a bit of a geek and watched all sorts of Sci-Fi programmes when I was younger so my imagination is running wild! Half human half Lion people? Liomans!! Making 'Superhumans' by giving them all the good qualities of other species such as vision, agility, speed, strength, reflexes etc? Well I'm sure a lot of people will be against that but I personally think that sounds AMAZING!
Friday, 10 June 2011
Tattoos
Tattoos are something that always intrigue me. When people get it right they look really cool in my eyes but when they get it wrong... Here's someone who probably will regret this in a few years time. The nob in question has had the profile picture of each of her Facebook friends tattooed all over her arm. She had 152 friends. Well not that it's a popularity conquest but I currently have 600 friends. I think I'd have to give up more than one arm to copy her. Like a dog, a tattoo is for life...not just Christmas. When people do stuff like this I think they should just have Dick Head tattooed across their forehead. But that's just my opinion, perhaps when she's 60 she won't regret it.
Plus I know for a fact that whilst I have met all of my 600 friends I don't know them all that well and probably won't see some of them ever again! (although I'm due another friend cull, I was upto nearly 750 and got down to 550 earlier this year...I'm everybodies mate when I'm pissed I swear!) So she must have people on her arm who are just 'randoms'. What a nob!!
Word of the Day: Proficiency
Quote of the Day: 'The Imagination imitates. It is the critical spirit that creates.' Oscar Wilde
Plus I know for a fact that whilst I have met all of my 600 friends I don't know them all that well and probably won't see some of them ever again! (although I'm due another friend cull, I was upto nearly 750 and got down to 550 earlier this year...I'm everybodies mate when I'm pissed I swear!) So she must have people on her arm who are just 'randoms'. What a nob!!
Word of the Day: Proficiency
Quote of the Day: 'The Imagination imitates. It is the critical spirit that creates.' Oscar Wilde
The perfect gift?
Wednesday, 8 June 2011
Hypnotised....for life
A hypnotist managed to leave three people in a trance after knocking himself out. This has got my brain ticking....what if they had been hypnotised forever!! What if you are actually under a trance and everything you do is being subtly controlled by someone you know? All sounds very Tin Foil Hat but what if it was possible? Perhaps it offers a better explanation for why George Bush was such a douche? Or maybe he had the american population hypnotised and that is how he got into power? Surely people aren't that stupid that they voted for him TWICE out of their own free will??
Maybe I am not normal because someone has hypnotised me and they are making me act this way? Maybe that is why I talk to the fridge! Yes yes I like this! I am weird because somebody else is making me do these things! The government? A friend? An angry ex lover? My dog?
Maybe I am not normal because someone has hypnotised me and they are making me act this way? Maybe that is why I talk to the fridge! Yes yes I like this! I am weird because somebody else is making me do these things! The government? A friend? An angry ex lover? My dog?
Stupid Supermarkets
A dopey Supermarket in Scotland had a price glitch resulting in 3 crates of beer selling for £11 instead of £20. It resulted in police being called as a large amount of people flocked to the Supermarket to take advantage of this mistake! If only it happened in Rochdale! Actually with our residents and the crime rates the way they are I imagine things would be rather wild here if the majority of our towns people were tanked up on beer! But still, gutted!!
The Immortal Dog
I stumbled across this article today. A dog was shot 40 times in the head and buried but still managed to survive. Whilst this appalling degree of animal cruelty has left me feeling disgusted I love the happy ending! Whilst I am aware that I am not normal, I can not comprehend how someone can carry out such cruel and evil acts upon an animal. I hope the dog in question manages to hunt her attackers down and rips out their throats. Yes, I feel strongly about animal cruelty. The dog has garnered a Facebook following, with a group dedicated to her will to live. I joined it, I'm so cool.
Tuesday, 7 June 2011
Do what's Expected!!!
Recently Marriage has had a rather profound impact upon my future. Not that I am getting married but a few people I know are. So I've been looking into some of the more 'out there' marriages.
Irregardless of sexuality, there is phenomenal pressure from the government, media, education systems and our own families to find a partner who is 'the one'. I'd like to point out I'm not a cynic, I just don't feel the need to pursue this. I feel this pressure has made some people go a little mad. A man in Korea married a pillow in 2010 and a woman has married the Eiffel Tower. I'm always completely overjoyed when friends of mine become engaged or get married (to another human being, but hey if they wanted to marry a pillow I'd understand....men in white coats...) Personally, for myself, it just seems to be surrounded by so many external factors that pressurise us to do it. I hope I've not offended anyone, it's a personal view for me and my life...each to their own, if you are happy I am happy for you :)! I just feel it's sent some people a bit mental. The pillow and Eiffel Tower people are somewhat tame to some of the ones I came across!
Celebrities such as Cameron Diaz and Enrique Iglesias have never tied the knot and both are in their mid to late thirties. Is this because they have not yet found 'the one'? I doubt it. Marriage isn't for everyone. This societal pressure and expectation that it is what everyone should do is archaic.
Which brings me to another point. I told a friend today that I planned to use some of my savings to go travelling with. Their response was 'Shouldn't you spend it on something like a deposit for your first house? That is what most people do.' What is wrong with me?! I want to be normal but I just have this thirst to explore and not be tied down. I want to see the world. Experience things that Rochdale will never offer. Do I sound young and immature? For once I don't think so. I'm 23, plenty of time to continue growing as a person. Just because it is what people normally do and expect you to do does not mean I'm going to, especially if I don't want to. Is this a rant? Slightly. Rochdale is making me feel more and more trapped by the day! Buy a house? I need to see a few more countries before I can make that sort of commitment! As for marriage....I'll propose to the Dog if my parents start to nag.
Word of the Day: Individuality
Quote of the Day:'In olden times sacrifices were made at the altar - a practise which is still continued.' Helen Rowland
Random Thought of the Day: At what age are you supposed to stop shivering when you stop peeing? Did everybody experience the shiver when they were young? How about now?
Guilty Confession of the Day: I still shiver when I stop peeing.
*I just want to reiterate - I'm 23! I want to explore some more. I'm not fully against any of the above. I feel comfortable enough in putting these views on here in the hope that I won't cause offense or come across as 'wrong'. Tis why i don't ever blog about religion. Everyone but Atheists hate Atheists!
Word of the Day: Individuality
Quote of the Day:'In olden times sacrifices were made at the altar - a practise which is still continued.' Helen Rowland
Random Thought of the Day: At what age are you supposed to stop shivering when you stop peeing? Did everybody experience the shiver when they were young? How about now?
Guilty Confession of the Day: I still shiver when I stop peeing.
*I just want to reiterate - I'm 23! I want to explore some more. I'm not fully against any of the above. I feel comfortable enough in putting these views on here in the hope that I won't cause offense or come across as 'wrong'. Tis why i don't ever blog about religion. Everyone but Atheists hate Atheists!
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